No feeling is “wrong,” it just exists, it’s then up to you to decide what you’re going to do with it.
Distant friends, work colleagues, acquaintances, or other people trying to support you often don’t know where to begin so they fall back on these insensitive clichés.
A list of administrative items that people commonly need to address in the wake of loss: property, personal items, life insurance, vehicles, and Social Security.
We all expect our emotions to be a mess when someone we love dies. What we often don’t expect are these common physical symptoms.
A simple plan where, in six steps, you can make life after loss just a little less overwhelming.
The 7 things that happen during the 10-14 days after the loss of a family member or friend are nearly universal and non-negotiable, they will happen whether you want them to or not.
Just Straight-up Hungover?
BLT with a fried egg and a glass of room temperature water. STAT!
Despite what some people may tell you, happiness, healing, and hope are not just things that happen with time, it does take some resolve. Your life is made up of the small decisions you make every day. Where you go, what you say, how you react, who you choose to be around, and what information … Continue reading 7 Tips for Making 2017 Your Own
To close out our week looking at the wonder and mystery of crying, we want to leave you with the option of digging a little deeper into those tears. If you’re feeling ambitious you can commit to an in-depth textbook devoted to the subject. “Why Only Humans Weep,” written by Ad Vingerhoets, the professor at … Continue reading Understanding “The Language of Tears”
This week Grief Compass is looking at why we cry and today we’re focused on an article from Time Magazine which presents one of my favorite theories, that emotional (or psychic) tears have a different chemical structure than the basal tears that just keep your eyes moist and the reflex tears that are produced in response … Continue reading Are Tears a Cry for Help?
We all know the feeling when we’re just about to cry. Emotion rises. Your shoulders pull up tight. A thick lump forms at the back of your throat. Breath becomes unsteady. Your chin trembles. You sniff as your nose starts to run. You fight it, but liquid starts to collect on your lower eyelid, blurring … Continue reading Why Does Grief Make Me Cry?
The world is big and scary sometimes. Like today. If the events in Belgium overwhelm you with fear or despair, take a second to make the world small. Here’s how: 1) Turn off the newsfeed or tv. The news will not get better, so leaving the barrage of information and images for a few minutes … Continue reading 6 Steps for Dealing with Fear After Belgium Attacks
Thank you for all your likes, shares, and comments! These tidbits of grief support definitely seem to have struck a common chord with many of you, and we hope they helped this year and in holidays to come. To make it easy for you to return to our holiday grief tips in one quick click I’m dropping all twelve right … Continue reading The 12 Days of Holiday Grief
See all the Days of Holiday Grief here. Find joy in the things you’re thankful for. Feeling happy does not mean you don’t miss your friend or family member, and is nothing to feel guilty about. It’s likely that the person you lost would actually prefer you be happy rather than spending the holiday in constant grief … Continue reading The 12 Days of Grief – Day Twelve
See all the Days of Holiday Grief here. Meaningful touch is an essential part of human communication. Support can be expressed and received through a pat on the shoulder, holding a hand, or embracing. The physical and psychological benefits of touch are well documented and simple contact can, in a very real way, remind others that they’re … Continue reading The 12 Days of Grief – Day Eleven
See all the Days of Holiday Grief here. You will not ruin Christmas if you cry. Grief carries with it a lot of emotion and the holidays are meant to be an emotional time of year—go ahead, cry. Give other people permission to cry too. Many times the best support you can give a crying person is … Continue reading The 12 Days of Grief – Day Ten
See all the Days of Holiday Grief here. Your friends and family are genuinely concerned about how you are doing. Prepare specific answers for questions like, “how are you holding up,” and “is there anything I can do to help?” Consider how your answers will be different if you’re asked by an acquaintance, relative, or best friend. … Continue reading The 12 Days of Grief – Day Nine
See all the Days of Holiday Grief here. This is a tough one. Take some time to consider the moments you’ll miss your lost friend or family member the most. Is there a special holiday tradition of which they were an integral part? If you think of these specific moments in private, you’ll likely be better prepared for those moments when they happen. But remember, it’s okay to get emotional when they do.
See all the Days of Holiday Grief here. Holiday celebrations are steeped in tradition and ceremony. For your holiday gathering, plan a memorial activity in which everyone can participate. This could be as simple as lighting a candle and sharing a prayer, or can be as involved as making personalized memorial tree ornaments. Traditions like these can … Continue reading The 12 Days of Grief – Day Seven
See all the Days of Holiday Grief here. We all know that over time memories start to fade. While the holiday memories of your lost family member or friend are still vivid in your mind, set aside some time to write them down. If a holiday memory strikes you unexpectedly make a reminder note in your phone … Continue reading The 12 Days of Grief – Day Six